During our last full conference for Time For God I was asked to do a morning devotion one day, so I thought I would share that will you all now. I started out that days devotion by reading Luke chapter 15 verses 11 through 32, which is more commonly known as The Parable of the Prodigal Son.
Jesus continued: “There was a man who had two sons. The younger one said to his father, ‘Father, give me my share of the estate.’ So he divided his property between them. “Not long after that, the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country and there squandered his wealth in wild living. After he had spent everything, there was a severe famine in that whole country, and he began to be in need. So he went and hired himself out to a citizen of that country, who sent him to his fields to feed pigs. He longed to fill his stomach with the pods that the pigs were eating, but no one gave him anything. “When he came to his senses, he said, ‘How many of my father’s hired servants have food to spare, and here I am starving to death! I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired servants.’ So he got up and went to his father. “But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him. “The son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.’ “But the father said to his servants, ‘Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let’s have a feast and celebrate. For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’ So they began to celebrate. “Meanwhile, the older son was in the field. When he came near the house, he heard music and dancing. So he called one of the servants and asked him what was going on. ‘Your brother has come,’ he replied, ‘and your father has killed the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.’ “The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him. But he answered his father, ‘Look! All these years I’ve been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!’ “‘My son,’ the father said, ‘you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’”
A lot of the time when this parable is looked at we focus on the prodigal son and the fathers love toward him, which mirrors God’s unconditional love for us. But for me this parable also shows how the father attempts to meet both of his children where they are at.
Now I know in this iteration of the story it does say the father pleaded with his oldest but if we look at the original Greek word παρεκάλει (parekalei). This word shows up several times in the bible and can range anywhere from begged to implore and even the word encouraged. Which is important, in my opinion, since it show the possible range of feelings and tactics the father had when going to his son. Most importantly he doesn’t become angry with his eldest but instead he comes before him and hears what the eldest is saying while still being able to help give some answers.
For me this can be applied and dose show up quite a bit at my placement. We have several of our resident who can take on the First son’s attitude. Such as Ryan or Zara who can at times focus on the fairness of the house and ask that same questions of “Why not for me too?”. This can prove challenging since were not allowed to share what happens with other residents in the house. However then I think about this teaching and how the father reminds the son that he is there for him and has been with him in other ways but the younger son needs this type rejoicing.
Through applied accompaniment we’re able to be present and listen to needs while still giving that small reminder that things do happen that they might not realize. Not only are we able to be with a person but we can see how that person is working in us. During these interactions I tend stop and think about is there a time where I have been the eldest son? Have I acted on impulse of my own perception in a situation? In short yes, right off the bat I can think of loads of times growing up with siblings thinking it’s not fair. However even now I can see myself falling into that thought process at times. But with continual growth am able recognize it happening. Between asking these questions and taking the calmer approach, rather than getting angry, we can all reach a better understanding of what is going on in a situation.
For the youngest the father at the time didn’t know he needed to be welcomed back with open and gracious arms. This action just so happens to suite the brothers needs at the time. I think it’s a great example of how being there for people can have a larger impact then you know. I can see this in Sheylee, Milo, and Samuel who have gone on binges at times and have shame over it not feeling like deserve help or are no more than their labels. But through making space and time to be there for them they have in return said how it makes them feel like more than just their condition or a label. Such as I like to think the younger brother felt when his father welcomed him. From going to not feeling worthy to still feeling like one of the fathers sons.
In situations like these where it’s hard for residents to accept help I am reminded when I felt like the younger brother. Not feeling like I deserved help or compassion but having people around me who showed up and knew I was lost but needed to be found. The thing I didn’t expect to learn by walking along residents like Sheylee is the people in your life really do want to help even if you don’t feel like they should be or want to. Kinda how the youngest son didn’t expect his father to take him back as a son but the father said let me give you my best. Which is really hard to see when you are actively going through feeling like the younger son.
Finally residents such as Christopher, Sheylee, and Samuel can at times also be like the father with lots of compassion and patients for any situation. They exemplify for me how to be patient and present even when other paths could be easier to take. Sometimes those traits can easily go unnoticed but by taking the time to listen, the residents help me better understand how I too can put those (and other traits) into action.
As volunteers we try to meet others where they are and give them grace. But sometimes it can be forgotten that we also can receive valuable lessons as well. Are there times in your placement where by being present you have learned a lesson you haven’t expected? Have there been times this year where you have impacted someone and not realized at the time? Or have you had to handle situations where someone had a hard time understanding?
*names have been changed to keep privacy for residents *
Photos (from left to right top then bottom row): TfG volunteers working on collages, a group of us playing Uno while waiting for our trains home, one of the TfG sessions, Folks hanging out during the outdoor activity time, and the YAGM UK group on our six months of service date
The rest of the conference went great we reflected on our time at placement, got to hang out with other volunteers, & were given several tools to help us along our way.